The swinger lifestyle can be deeply fulfilling and a lot of fun, but stepping out of the comforts of a traditional monogamous relationship can be difficult. After all, it goes against most societal norms, and approaching your partner about swinging can be tricky. Most couples explore the idea slowly. And even after both agreeing and expressing interest in the lifestyle, usually proceed with some concerns about how it might affect their relationship going forward. However, once involved, many couples (though not all) wonder why they didn’t get into the lifestyle sooner! So what leads happy & well connected couples to take the plunge and try non-monogamy?
Rush of New Relationship Energy
The thrill of the chase is something you lose once you’ve settled down with the love of your life. You can go on date nights, you can have great sex regularly, you can try new things together, but you ultimately forfeit the fun of meeting new people and the rush that comes with exploring potential new relationships. Swinging re-opens the door to exciting new relationship energy.
Obviously, being with your partner comes with other benefits of stability. It gives you someone you share a deep connection with, someone to raise a family with, someone who will be at your side for better or worse. But dating is, well, … so much fun! And who doesn’t love a good challenge? The thrill of the chase, the excitement of being with someone new, the first kiss, seeing someone naked for the first time, and all the novelty of something simply being new, is something you lose with monogamy.
Swinging provides a virtually unlimited number of ways to keep chasing the high of a new relationship, while still sharing your life with the person you love. You share the thrill of the chase together! Online dating especially provides the sensual and naughty fun of sending photos, exchanging steamy text messages, and building anticipation to meet and finally be with another couple. Swinging can make you more excited than ever and spark renewed excitement with your own partner.
Share New Experiences
At some point in a long term monogamous relationship, you will inevitably get a little bored, or at least less surprised, with your sex life as it can fall into a routine. Especially if you were sexually adventurous to begin with and things have slowed down or become stagnant since settling down. Naturally, you’ll want to spice things up! By sharing the experience of swinging, you and your partner are very likely to both open up sexually (as well as in your general life), and have more overall fun together. It relieves the stress of suggesting new ideas and opens the lines of communication.
And it’s not just your sex life. Trying new experiences, whatever they might be, is something that will help you continuously build your own private relationship. It’s a well-known fact that experiences bring people together, so the more you can share with your partner, the better! It’s just another wonderful way to make memories that will last a lifetime together. Have you already enjoyed speed boats? Taking that first thrilling boat ride is how it feels stepping into the swinging lifestyle – just another type of intoxicating experience. And you may find it leads you into a whole world of excitement and pleasure that you could have only dreamed of. You only live once! And swinging provides you with an ever expanding range of experiences to add to your relationship.
Explore Your Bisexuality
If you’ve ever been a little bi-curious, but haven’t had the chance to explore that side of your sexuality, swinging gives you an outlet to give it a try and see how you like it. And exploring bisexuality with your partner comes with the added benefit of not risking what you have already built together because there’s communication, shared involvement and everyone is aware of what’s going on. Is there anything worse than feeling like you’ll never get to experience something you’re interested in trying? Life is too short for regrets which is why the swinging lifestyle has many bisexual swingers.
The Kinsey scale, which was created in the 1950s after extensive research, is a 7-point scale which represents the diversity and fluidity of sexual orientation. The Kinsey research suggests many people are at least a little a bi-curious at one point in their life. It is estimated that as many as 30% of the population may be on the scale of bisexuality but too often do not disclose it for a variety of reasons. Swinging provides a measure of freedom from those stigmas (and other sexual stigmas too!).
Swinging Can Bring You Closer Together
The honesty and communication that is so vital to a successful swinging relationship cannot be stressed enough. You can be (and need to be!) honest with each other about what you expect from the lifestyle, and stay open about what’s going on in your heart and in your head.
If your sex life has gotten a little dull after sleeping with the same person for however many years, you will find that swinging gives your sex life a massive revival. Not just when you’re with other partners, but with your spouse as well. The excitement that comes along with a new sexual experience makes you want to bring that energy home to the bedroom. You and your partner may take pleasure by turning each other on with stories and memories of your extra-marital exploits from a recent swinger experience. The memories of what you get up to together at a party, a couple’s date, or swingers club will have you enlivened and ready for more.
Take a Vacation
This comes twofold. Primarily, in the metaphorical sense, swinging provides a nice little vacation from the daily grind. The nine to five, your routine, spending your nights in cozied up with another movie and a cup of tea. You can continue to be the perfect parent, attend those PTA meetings, be a dedicated partner, good neighbor, and hard-working employee… but you can also indulge your wild side.
And then of course there’s the literal vacation… there are swinger cruises, resorts, and getaways that you can go on too! It just gives you another reason to use those paid vacation hours you’ve accrued and treat yourselves to some sexy fun.
Really, there are countless reasons to take the leap and check out the swinging lifestyle. If it’s something you’re considering, it’s something worth exploring. If you know you would respect a similar suggestion from your partner, you can be confident they’ll do the same for you. Take it easy and let them know that you’re interested (maybe don’t lead with the fact that you’re feeling bored though) and give them some time to think about it. In the meantime, you could do some research about which dating sites to try and where to find parties or clubs in your area. Life is too short to regret not trying!