Swinging and consensual non-monogamy is not really something they talked about in high school. People can be too embarrassed to talk about the different options that are available for them to enjoy their intimate lives. We are here to help demystify and explain why a happy & healthy couple would choose to be swingers.
Whether you want to explore your sexual orientation, live out a fantasy, or just have fun with people who have the same kinks, swinging is a way of life that draws a crowd from all walks of life.
These are some of the most common reasons people get into swinging.
Add excitement to their sex life (without cheating)
After couples have been together for many years, it is not uncommon that the passionate sex life they had in the beginning has dwindled a bit and they crave something more. Swingers decide to go on this journey together. Because swingers meet sexual partners together, and often find that it helps them liven up their own sex life back at home as they feel more attractive and adventurous.
If you’re not really into something that your partner loves, it can be a great way for them to have their needs met by someone else in this way assuming everyone involved consents to this sexy option.
Help strengthen their emotional bond
Couples who swing usually find that it has strengthened their bond because they communicate more about their sexual and emotional desires. It takes trust, as you are opening the doors to heartbreak if something goes wrong. But knowing your partner will always come home with you, because they choose you over anyone else, can boost your closeness. Open & honest communication is great for all relationships. Swingers tend to have more of this communication which really helps to strengthen their emotional bond.
Want to explore areas of their sexual orientations
Many swingers, particularly woman, are bisexual or bi-curious. They are now happily settled in a long-term heterosexual relationship, but feel an itch to explore this side of their sexuality, either because they realized their orientation later in life or because they just didn’t have the chance when they were younger. The swinging community is a very welcoming & non judgmental place. People can safely explore their sexy desires & fantasies.
Enjoy friendly & supportive community
The bonds you can make with other swinging friends are often much stronger than with your everyday vanilla friends. After all, once you’ve taken your clothes off and jumped into bed with them, there is little else you need to hide. These friendly swinging bonds can be very strong and evolve into swinging cliques as established lifestyle friends hang out with their favorite friends. Swingers usually build close friendships with others on the scene partly for this reason, and partly because you share something in common, and you have already extended a lot of trust to them.
It’s a hot, sexy fantasy
For many people, swinging might be just a way to live out a fantasy. Because many people have sexual fantasies that involve more than one person, it can be impossible to explore them alone at home. This might be a man who wants to explore a double-loved fantasy, or her husband watching her with a woman. Whatever the combination, swinging opens up the opportunity to live out your most secret fantasies in real life. Life is short, so why not enjoy it?
Step away from real life
Work, kids, family, cleaning, chores, car payments. Life can be stressful. The swinging lifestyle can offer a few hours away from real life. Call a babysitter, get dressed up in your favorite clothes, maybe put on some make up, and leave the house confident and feeling sexy. Everyday life is stressful, so its refreshing to meet other swingers and live this sexy fantasy together. You will quickly forget the life outside when you’re surrounded by beautiful people and talking about sex rather than mortgages and bills. Some swingers parties are themed, allowing you to dress up and ‘act’ another person for a night. It can be a bit of bump back down to reality when you’re standing in the cold waiting for a taxi, but the mental and physical break from your every day life is a welcome one.
Don’t want to cheat
Sort of a combination of some of the points above, one of the biggest factors that draw people to the swinging lifestyle is because they don’t want to cheat. They are happy with their long-term stable relationship, but they just want to live out a fantasy, explore their bisexual side, or add some flare into the bedroom. It’s quite normal that long term relationships become less passionate over time if you don’t pay attention, but that doesn’t mean they love each other any less or would consider leaving each other. Swinging offers a way to stay together without cheating to meet these other wants and desires.
Learn more about your partner & yourself
The swingers lifestyle is all about exploration, and you might be surprised to find out how much you didn’t know about your partner. Do they have a specific type in women? Are they a bit of a voyeur? Or perhaps an exhibitionist? Our partners surprise us constantly, and swinging can open up new parts of their character. You will learn a lot about yourself too, and might be surprised what kind of thing you’re into that you had never thought about before.
It’s good old-fashioned fun!
Society mostly still ties up sex with love, but the truth is that many people can have sex without emotional ties. Sex is fun and sex with multiple partners can be even more fun. Particularly because no two people are exactly the same in bed. Each person has different techniques, different ways of doing things, and will do some things better than others. Having sex with other people allows you to explore this, and maybe even learn some new things to do with your partner when it’s just the two of you.
We are not saying that swinging is a good match for everyone. It is definitely an option for many people to embrace their sexuality in a healthy and rewarding manner. Swinging emphasizes honesty, trust, consent & integrity to ensure the sexy fun happens in a safe manner for all involved. Go & live the life that is best for you!