You probably know how to dress for the office, for a wedding, for a vanilla night out, or a casual lunch with vanilla friends. But you probably don’t know how to dress for a swinger event. Hint: when deciding what to wear for swinging it is definitely not like any of those vanilla outfits!
Your vanilla wardrobe will probably need some updating before you enter the lifestyle. Making the best first impression goes beyond fitness and grooming. This doesn’t mean you have to wear clothes that make you uncomfortable: you can show as much or as little skin as you like and still be sexy. To best represent your sexy side, pick clothes that are currently in style, and have them tailored to your body.
We know you love that favorite old shirt and that it’s comfortable, but to everyone else, it looks like you’re wearing a puffy, stained garbage bag. You’re a good-looking person, and everyone should know it! Avoid the baggy stuff and go with slim or fitted cuts. Worried that fitted clothes won’t suit your body? Well, a baggy sweatshirt certainly won’t make you look skinny! Baggy clothes just make you look bigger.
You should realize that your clothes are speaking for you before you even open your mouth to say hello. You want to convey the right message, like how the bed hoppers podcasting couple smartly does it. The right clothes will show people that you’re sexy and have your act together. This goes for men and women.
A lot of women are in tune with fashion, and go out of their way to look sexy daily; men, not so much. Let your clothes help communicate your mood and swinging goals. If you’re looking for action, wear more revealing and daring clothes. If you’re not looking to get involved physically just yet, dress a bit more conservatively so people get the message.
It may sound prejudiced, but guys are usually the deal-breaker when it comes to wardrobe. Women in the lifestyle often complain that guys don’t care enough about their appearance. In general, ladies in the lifestyle do an excellent job looking hot. They pick awesome outfits that make them look even more incredible than their usual sexy self.
Too many guys don’t care enough and they show it by picking bad, ill-fitting, out of fashion, wrinkled, dirty clothes that are torn or ripped. No woman is going to take one for the team and agree to play with a sloppy dude. She and her partner will walk right past you and go for the well-dressed couple who look like they know what they’re doing.
Many guys need to upgrade their wardrobe when they enter the lifestyle. You want to build a wardrobe that will appeal to most ladies and help you present yourself in the best light. Don’t fight it, embrace it, and thank your wife for helping you look half as good as she does.
Every swinging event is different, so here are some clothing suggestions for the different situations you might found yourself in. When in doubt, you can always contact the event organizers for suggestions.
Meet & Greet Wardrobe
These tend to be more subdued and hosted in vanilla places so save your crazy, sexy outfits for another time. Go with a more polished and sophisticated look. Imagine what people would wear to a Las Vegas nightclub. Ladies, this can be a sexy dress with some cleavage or a sexy leg slit. You can also wear nice pants that show off your derriere and a silk blouse. Let’s not forget the shoes. Bust out your sexy heels! Ladies have many options, so pick the outfit that makes you feel most proud of your sexy body.
If the Meet & Greet is in a private place, don’t be surprised if many ladies go topless as the night progresses. When picking your top, you want to think about how it will transition if you choose to join the other topless ladies. Of course, you can always hand your top to your guy. For some reason, men seem to always be more than willing to help when a sexy lady wants to show off her breasts.
Speaking of men, it’s time to polish up. Imagine business casual with a sexy twist. It’s probably best to skip jeans and go for some fitted chinos. Make sure the pants have some spare room, just in case those topless ladies encourage some growth below the belt. If it is a good Meet & Greet, you are going to want to feel comfortable when things get hotter – and you get harder. You will probably have better luck picking a collared shirt over a t-shirt. Skip the sneakers and go with smart-looking loafers – easier to slip off & on, which is a good thing. Imagine yourself on the cover of GQ.
Of course, this all depends on who is organizing and attending this Meet & Greet, and which people you are hoping to attract. If it’s a pool party, then a more casual approach would be appropriate. If you do go with a casual look, make sure it doesn’t look sloppy. Sloppy ain’t sexy. No matter the location and atmosphere, you want to communicate with other swingers that you care about your sexy appearance. Here are just a few sample outfits…
Swinger Club Wardrobe
Each lifestyle club is different so ask the club organizers about appropriate attire. Ladies might wear a long coat, so they can enter the club while wearing sexy attire that might not be street legal. You want something that is sexy and easy to take off. This could be a lacy lingerie outfit, a sheer blouse, and hip-hugging pants, a sexy cosplay costume, or your sexiest nightclub attire. You can show as much or as little skin as you like.
It is usually sexier to not expose all your best parts. Covering up a little bit helps leave something to the imagination. As for shoes, you want sexy shoes that are safe for stairs after you have had a few drinks. You might want to go with sexy boots or wedges to make it a little easier to navigate any stairs.
Some clubs have play areas where no clothes are allowed, so you and your partner can decide if you want to enter those areas. It is very common for ladies to bring a second or third sexy outfit to wear, like a robe or lingerie, so they can get even more attention looking hotter & hotter as the night progresses.
Guys, it is much simpler for you. You are following the same guidelines for a Meet & Greet. If you want, you can go with silk pajama pants, but you don’t want to look sloppy. If you haven’t already upgraded your underwear, you should do it before going to a swinger club because you’ll likely find yourself walking around in just your boxers or briefs at some point. Don’t go crazy with the underwear and skip the zebra stripes and speedos. Almost every guy will look good in Calvin Klein or Hugo Boss black modal boxer briefs.
Theme Night Party Wardrobe
If you are attending a club or party that has chosen a theme, embrace it, and get creative. Just remember that whatever you put on should also be easy to take off. This might mean you don’t wear the best outfit you have. For example, if you have an amazing full body corset that takes 20 minutes to be unlaced, it’s probably not a good option if you are hoping to play with others. Also, avoid face paint because it is going to look horrible after making out with your new friends. Guys, make sure your outfit compliments your sexy lady’s theme outfit.
House Party Wardrobe
Ask your host for suggested attire. Usually, a bit of flexibility and dressing in layers will be best here. Show up wearing street-legal clothes for a sexy Meet & Greet. Ladies, think about a fashionable jacket or a pashmina shawl over a silk shell that shows a bit of cleavage and a very sexy bra underneath the silk shell. This enables you to quickly adjust your outfit so you can be anything from a fully-covered, tasteful tease to a sultry siren in your sexy lingerie. This will help you feel more comfortable and in control, which is very nice if you are about to meet a bunch of new people at a swinger house party.
The energy of house parties can start slowly as people show up. Once most people have arrived be prepared for the night to quickly escalate. Therefore, we suggest dressing in sexy layers to give you flexibility in matching the vibe of the house party. Men have it simple: dress up just like a meet & greet but make sure you have sexy underwear and polished shoes.
Hotel Takeover Wardrobe
This depends a bit on whether it’s a full or partial hotel takeover. A partial takeover party is when you share the hotel with vanilla people, so best to treat it like a house party. You can wear something sexy, but it should be appropriate in case you bump into families on the elevator. You can pack your swinger bag with some very sexy and revealing lingerie to change into if you invite others back to your room.
Thankfully, a bunch of hotel takeovers are full takeovers where you have much more wardrobe freedom. Full hotel takeovers allow only swingers past the reception area, so you can often wear very revealing outfits. Full nudity might even be allowed in the hotel hallways and pool area (definitely make sure you check before strutting out in your birthday suit!). The hotel bar & restaurant areas will require a little bit of clothing.
We like to start with something comfortable to travel in. Then pack some outfits for the day time. There are often sexy demonstrations and guest speakers during the day. You want to make many connections during the day so you can have a fun time at night. Some possible day time outfits can be a bikini with a cover-up, plunging shirts, or sexy yoga pants with a crop top. Most people don’t play during the day at the hotel takeover. Daytime is usually more for introductions and light flirting, so save your super sexy stuff for later. Guys remember not to be sloppy. Casual is fine as long as you keep it polished. Remember we want to be making a good impression on the new friends we are about to discover.
There is usually a big party at night with a DJ or live music. You’ll see most people wearing sexy club clothes or lingerie. Some people will leave the party midway just to change into a sexier outfit. Since you will have your hotel room, pack a bunch of different outfits. We all have a bunch of sexy stuff that we don’t get to wear nearly enough. This is a golden opportunity to show them off to a crowd that will truly appreciate it!
Also, make sure to pack some comfy clothes for breakfast the next day. If everything went right, you will have worked up a huge appetite from the sexy shenanigans of the previous night. Again, guys have it very easy. During the day, wear a casual fitted shirt with a collar. This can be a polo shirt or a buttoned shirt. Save the t-shirts for your pajamas. At night, break out some nice jeans or dress pants with a fitted buttoned shirt. Loose-fitting clothes will not show off your physique. T-shirts will look sloppy and make people think you don’t care, which just isn’t true. No matter what, always make sure to look good.
Where do Swingers Shop?
Ami Clubwear
Our personal favorite and first site we shop at. Good spot for party dresses, club dresses, and just about any type of sexy dress you can imagine. They carry a wide selection of shoes to match just about any swinger outfit. Ami also carries a wide selection of sexy costumes so you can match any swinger party theme. They have sexy intimate lingerie so you can keep looking sexy after you take your dress off. Has sexy stuff in petite & plus sizes. Usually has the best prices from the sites we check so you can buy a few different options.
Pink Basis
A reliable source of sexy & trendy outfits at good prices. A wide selection of sexy dresses & separates. They carry club dresses, bandage dresses, club outfits, and just about anything a swinger would want. They have a wide selection of shoes and boots to match your smoking hot outfit. Of course, they carry a wide selection of sexy costumes so you can match your swinger club theme. Intimates and swimsuits as well. Has sexy stuff in junior & plus sizes. Prices are good but usually not as good as Ami Clubwear.
Upscale Stripper
One of the fanciest and hottest sensual boutique stores. It has countless sexy dancer outfits to make you look amazing and also be easy to get off & on for swinging fun. It also has a wide variety of sexy but still vanilla venue approved outfits for those meet & greets. A wide range of shoes and heels to make a stunning impression the next time you visit the club. Of course, it also has a huge collection of hot costumes. Unfortunately, no plus sizes.
Yandy
Just like the other three, it has plenty of sexy & hot stuff you won’t find in your regular vanilla stores. They run plenty of special offers and discounts so you can stretch your budget and stock up on many different sexy options. Dresses, swimsuits, lingerie, costumes & shoes. Plus sizes tend to cost a bit more. No men’s options except for the costume selections for Halloween.
These four sites will cover all of your swinger party attire needs.
What do Swingers Look Like?
Remember that sexiness is more a state of mind than a dress size number. Wear what makes you feel confident & sexy! Swingers are friendly people who are more interested in you than your clothes so relax about picking the perfect sexy outfit. Whatever makes you smile and feel proud of your sexy self is the perfect outfit. To help new swingers who might be feeling anxious about what to wear we shared a few examples of what other ladies wear at swinger events. These are just a small sample of what swingers wear. Don’t worry if you didn’t see your outfit. We don’t have enough space to show all the possible swinging outfits.
Swingers come in all sexy shapes and sizes. We all have a sexy body even if we might not always feel the sexiest in our own skin. You do you! Go with the outfit that makes you feel confident & sexy because you are 🙂