Just because you attend a swinger party doesn’t mean you have to play with anyone. You can attend as a sexy voyeur or exhibitionist. You can relax, enjoy a drink, participate in sexy conversation, and be yourself without fear of being judged. Many different types of sexual fantasies are more common than you’d think, and sex-positive people are willing to share those fantasies aloud. The lifestyle is very welcoming of different types of swinging. Even if no one else shares your fantasies, swingers are unlikely to judge you for sharing them.
Besides just sharing your sexy fantasies, feelings, and ideas, you can share your sexy body without physically engaging. Hot, skin-baring outfits are common – so are not wearing any outfits at all and being bare! You may see two ladies take their tops off to compare breasts – you’re allowed to enjoy this, because boobs are fun and sexy. As more people go topless and people grow more comfortable, you might see other couples going fully nude or even having sex. While you should try not to gawk or ogle, you can certainly appreciate and enjoy the sexy atmosphere around you. Things will probably get even hotter, and you may have to control your instinct to stare as the party ramps up beyond your expectations. Try to keep your jaw off the ground! If you and your partner are feeling really excited, you can do your own public display of affection. The hotter your performance, the more likely you will be asked by others if they can join. If you don’t want to swap, just say no thanks. Swingers are very respectful and will understand you just want to have a hot and sexy time with your own partner.
Being exhibitionist in the lifestyle is a good way to ease into it and test the waters with a low risk of jealousy from swinging. Be smart and do what works best for you at the pace that is right for you. Many newbies eventually find that being a voyeur or exhibitionist just isn’t satisfying enough when they are at a swinger party, so check in with your partner and see if you both want to take it to the next level. Maybe you both decide you like being “dirty vanillas” or “non swinging swingers” and maybe you both decide you want to be more like full swap swingers. Whatever you decide and call yourself is fine as long as you both agree and are honest about it.
If you aren’t ready to take the step to do anything physical with someone else, you don’t have to. You can just enjoy the sexy vibe and contribute back to the sexy vibe by looking sexy & sharing some sexy action with your special someone in view of the other swingers. Just make sure to respect and honor the rules of the swinger party you are attending. Each swinger party host has slightly different rules and different boundaries of what can be done in public and what should be done behind closed doors.
The swinging lifestyle appreciates the voyeurs and exhibitionists in our ranks. We want to be very clear that swingers are not here to entertain you. It is expected that everyone at a swinger party or event is mature enough to have mutual respect for each other. Sure you can feel nervous, or uncertain about your comfort level. That is fine. What isn’t fine is treating a swinger party like your private zoo for your viewing pleasure. Remember to be respectful of others and give back to the sexy atmosphere in some way. In other words don’t be a creep and it will all be cool.