Wondering how to connect with the right swingers for your sexy time? You have enough headaches dealing with your work, family, & friends. We want to make your swinging time a fun and enjoyable experience without any drama or trouble.
How do you spot and identify trouble in the swinging lifestyle? Relax. We are here to give you an easy rundown
on how you can develop the right way to evaluate each swinger couple’s vibe. We are going to ignore their hot and attractive looks. Look past their sexy offers and chat with them to figure out if they are worth of your sexy swinger time. Here are the questions you can use to screen your potential swinger dates.
Initial Screen Questions
- How long have you been together?
You want to make sure they are in a secure and drama relationship. Life is too short to waste time dealing with their headaches.
- How long have you been swinging?
Are they experienced and ready for action or are you possibly going to be facing many rookie mistakes and distractions.
- What do you like best about swinging?
A chance to uncover if they are trying to save a flawed relationship or are they doing this for the right reasons that align with your personal preferences.
- Do you have any rules or boundaries?
Figure out if your rules & boundaries are compatible with their rules & boundaries.
- When was your last STI check-up?
Find out if they take safe sex seriously and how they feel about condom use. Don’t assume anything.
- How do you have fun outside of the bedroom?
Helps to make a more personal connection and open up conversation/flirting topics later.
- Can we set up a group chat or have solo chats?
Using kik, skype, group email or whatever helps to ensure everyone is informed and avoid nasty surprises. Sometimes you might want to reach out for a solo chat. You should ask if that is allowed in a group chat first to avoid accidentally offending anyone.
- What are you hoping will happen?
Helpful to know what they are thinking so everyone has similar expectations. Is it going to be a wham-bam or is there going to be a slow build-up? Is it going to be slow & gentle or vigorous & rough? You don’t need to overplan but it can be helpful to have a general sense of what they want. It’s not fun having a disconnect where one party thinks it is an introductory coffee chat and the other party thinks it is immediate sex.
- Do you have any questions?
This gives the swinging couple a chance to ask you their questions and to show what they are focusing on. it also gives them a chance to show they are interested in you as a person and not just a piece of meat. Most people don’t like being a nameless body and enjoy making a sexy personal connection.
Bonus Unicorn Questions
- Have you had a threesome before?
Unicorns – Many swingers are experienced with foursomes but have never had a threesome and might not know how to balance a three legged chair to ensure everyone is happy and engaged.
- Why are you looking for a single girl and not a couple?
You want to probe if there is any potential jealousy or imbalance in their relationship. Some couples new to opening their relationship have jealousy issues preventing them to feel comfortable with another man joining.
- Can you play with both of them?
Some couples like to use a single female as a sex toy and not as a teammate. Be on the lookout for one sided rules. Ask about kissing and if you are free to do anything with anyone. Is this only bifemale action or a free for all?
- Group play or solo play?
What happens if one of them falls asleep or is too drunk? Can you play with just one of them if the other is or is not in the same room?
Planning the Actual Date!
- Where are you going to meet?
Most swingers live in different towns and sometimes these towns can be over an hour drive away. Are you going to meet in the middle? Are you going to meet in their town? Does the meeting area have bars, restaurant and available hotel rooms?
- Which place are you going to meet up?
Are you starting in a hotel room, their house or at a public place? Hotel room implies a fast track to sex. Their house can mean anything. A public place like a bar or restaurant implies building a personal connection before any sexy time. Many people like to meet in public first. If they misrepresented themselves, it is easier for to walk away if you are at a public venue.
- What are you going to do?
Obviously you all want to have sex but what are you going to do before that? Going to a movie theatre isn’t great because you don’t have any chance to talk or flirt during the movie. Going to a family friendly space isn’t great because screaming little children aren’t sexy. Think about something that will give you a chance to chat like going to a pool hall, doing a wine tasting, singing karaoke, spending the day at the beach or whatever you like.
- What about the next day?
This is more a question to ask yourself. Think about the day after. Are you going to sleep over at their house or spend the night in a shared hotel bed or head home to your own place?
Phew! That’s a long list of screening questions. Remember, everyone is different so feel free to customize this list to reflect what is most important to you. Stay safe and enjoy swinging 🙂