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You are here: Home / Swinging Basics / Swinging for Dummies Checklist

Swinging for Dummies Checklist

It’s no surprise that people enjoy sexy fun and want to learn how to make it happen.  Thankfully the swinging lifestyle enables adults to make it a reality in a safe & consenting environment.

To help guide you through this sexy world, we have an easy swinging for dummies checklist that you can follow along.  This will help you have the sexiest fun with the least amount of drama because relationship speed bumps aren’t enjoyable for anyone. So follow our roadmap to avoid them.

Step 1 – Read Swingers’ Little Helper

You can order this on Amazon or download it free on our site. This is a 300 page guide that covers the many different questions you are going to have about swinging, protecting your relationship, and how to keep your sexy fun a discreet matter.  It covers all the questions you have & don’t even realize yet that you have.

Step 2 – Chat with Your Partner

Once you understand the different aspects of the swinging lifestyle you should talk with your partner. Figure out what you want to happen and don’t want to happen. Your partner might need time to think about this because starting to swing is a big step in any relationship. Be understanding and don’t pressure them.

Step 3 – Choose Your Rules & Boundaries

Once you both agree to start swinging, you should figure out your rules. Remember swinging is about ethical non-monogamy & not about cheating. What makes it ethical? You both agree to rules & boundaries that you both consent to obey. It is your relationship so together you can take control of your relationship rules.

Step 4 – Create Your Swinging Profile

Join the popular swinging site for your local area. This will help you meet other local swingers and discover the local swinger house parties and club events.  This will also create a way for you to communicate with swingers without revealing your vanilla phone or email info.  Here are some tips for making a better swinging profile, be smart and don’t be lazy with this step.

Step 5 – Upgrade Your Image

Most of us have stopped trying to look our best once we are in a long term relationship. If you want to attract new swinger friends you should take pride in your appearance. Get some nice fitting clothes that show off your best features. Head to the gym to boost your fitness & confidence. Get back on top of your overall grooming game.

Step 6 – Start Slow & Sober

When you are ready for your first real life swinger party or date with another swinger couple, remember to take it easy. Dress to impress because first impressions do matter. You are probably going to feel very nervous so be careful you don’t accidentally drink too much. Sloppy drunks are rarely sexy and you don’t want to accidentally break any of your rules because you are drunk. When in doubt go slow. You can always do more next time.

Step 7 – Stay Connected

Remember swinging is more of a team event. You are in this together so you should regularly check in and communicate with each other. If you feel nervous, share that and your partner can help relax you. If you don’t like something, share that with your partner so they can avoid having it repeat. Be the best teammates to each other.

Step 8 – Respect Others

You are going to meet many different people so skip the drama and always be friendly & respectful towards other people. If you aren’t interest in another couple, politely decline their offer. If you are interested in others, make sure to always ask before touching. Consent and respecting others is very important to swingers.

Step 9 – Drama Happens

We are all human and all having feelings. At one point or another there is going to be a miscommunication or a misunderstanding. Try your best to work together to deescalate the situation and figure out what changes you can make to avoid a repeat. Keep reminding yourself and your special that swinging is just a sexy fun bonus to your already great relationship.

Step 10 – Collaboration Not Competition

Approach the swinging lifestyle with a collaborative viewpoint. Swinging is never going to replace your amazing relationship with your special someone. It just adds some sexy spice to it. Swingers come in all shapes, sizes & talents. That doesn’t mean they are better than incredible special someone. It just means they are different and it can be fun and refreshing to experience something different from time to time.  Don’t be dummies.  Remember another swinger can’t replace the amazing emotional connection you have with your special someone.

Last Updated: February 22, 2022
Written By:Dr. Georgia

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Welcome to the Swingers Lifestyle

Welcome to Swingers Help! We’re Dr. Georgia & Will Fuchs, a married couple who have been enjoying our swinging time through the consensual non-monogamy community. Our experience hasn’t been perfect or drama-free but we don’t regret at all making the decision to start swinging. To share our swinging enjoyment, we authored the top ranked Swingers’ Little Helper book and provide free videos, articles, games, & relationship exercises on this site.  Join us as we share our insights on the swinging lifestyle.

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