Shared by pokagurl
Disclaimer: For simplicity purposes I will use terms and phases to describe people and activities. This is not meant to reduce, dehumanize or disrespect anyone. I am contentious, courteous and respectful but for purposes of sharing my unicorn experience, I will have to simplify things to help others in on my experience without writing a book.
Friday night: Meet in greet was super chill and upbeat. Saturday: Pool party was relaxing and good. Ballroom dance was great. Overall, I had a fun experience.
My attitude: Be proactive. Smile, go up to others say hello and ask open ended questions. Be friendly and get to know more about them and their lifestyle experiences.
Be proactive with someone I’m interested in or activities that I want to do.
I stayed Friday and Saturday night in order to get the full experience. I’m glad that I did. I didn’t get the party floor but actively invited those who I thought were cool (not necessarily interested in) to my room for the after party. This was my proactive way to ensure I’d have the experience I wanted. Bring the party to my room instead of relying on the party floor.
Friday night: Meet up with a couple I had previously spoke to online, with other couples Friday night. We had dinner and a few drinks. I really hit it with the guy but his wife wasn’t there mentally, they got wind of a sick family member and it preoccupied her mind. By the time dinner was finished more LS folks was at the hotel bar so we joined them. I met several interesting people and had some great conversations. I hit it off with Lady A. I hadn’t been too successful in this area. Up until now with couples, I tend to hit off with the guy but the lady either shows no interest or is very hard to read if the interest is there. We seemed into each other mentally and physically. I invited her for more but she said she was tired and had to work (she and her hubby were hosting), so I left it open to meet up the next day. We exchanged numbers and I left on a high note. Me and the rest of the group mingled until about 130 am.
I’m really glad I had previously spoken to a couple. We walked down to hotel restaurant together and we met with people they already knew. Friday night wasn’t a full hotel takeover so there wasn’t a way to tell of LS v vanilla folks. This couple helped break the ice and introduced me to everyone. They made me feel right at home. It wouldn’t have been the same without having known someone and a lot more intimidating for me.
Saturday am: I get a text from the guy that him and his wife are leaving early to tend to the sick family member. At this point, I am “on my own” in the sense that I had no couple to fall back on so whatever I wanted, I needed to go after it.
PM pool party: I was on the first people there and went straight to the hot tub. Within 10 mins I was surrounded by all couples. I said hello and asked open ended questions. I got to know them and their story. It was really relaxing and steamy experience…literally I was sweating from the hot tub. It freeing to see couples have sex and be so open to expressing their sexuality. I hit it off with some that I had met there and reconnected with a had met the night before. I told them about the after party in my room and to come by. I got to see Lady A I hit it off with the night before and she was warm and friendly towards me.
Pm Ballroom: I went to dance and had a great time. I met some folks at the preparty and reconnected with others I had met at earlier times. We danced together and had a few drinks.
Here’s where the drama comes in: I had reached out to a couple online couple I was interested in about a week prior to this event. They told me there wasn’t equal attraction from both of them so it was a deal breaker. I told them I appreciated their honesty and wished them well. Well, I saw them at the event, introduced myself and wished them both a good time (it was genuine).
Meanwhile Lady A from Friday night I hit it off with, I saw her while someone was interacting with her. I went up to both of them and tried to interact with both of them. She ignored me and didn’t acknowledge my presence. I thought ok, maybe she’s busy. So I tried to get her her attention again and she ignored me.
This was a bit confusing for me because we had hit it off Friday night and when I saw her earlier at the pool party, she was warm and receptive. I was like, ok she must have changed her mind. I’ll just move on.
I went back in to dance and hit it off with Lady B. I had met her Friday night. We danced together and she said I was super hot and I could kiss her. I invited her to my room and she agreed. We decided to get a drink from the bar first. After the drink, we were walking up to the room and she got stopped by people she knew. I was fine with it and didn’t want to impede that. This went on for about 10 mins. Then she told me she needed to go to the rest room. She was in there for 20+ mins. By this time I was talking to others to pass time. I went in to make sure she was ok and she was talking to other women in the bathroom.
She came out 5 mins later then went up to lady A and started kissing. I felt super rejected at that point and almost crushed. I was bold enough to invite her to my rm and she literally forgot about me. I could tell when I invited her up that she was into me but she literally left me hanging. I decided to move on. I went in to dance some more and saw the couple that I got rejected from again. By this time having experienced so much rejection within 45 mins, I almost lost it.
The couple I danced with could tell something was wrong. I told them about it and they tried to comfort me. I went to my room to listen to music to get myself together. It was a moment of truth. I had so many questions and so many emotions I didn’t know what to do. I listened to 3 songs and felt better so I was about to leave.
Right then I heard a knock on my door. One of the couples came to check on me to see if I was ok. I let them in and we talked. I invited them to have a drink and put on some music. I left to get some ice. When I walked back in they were participating in some festivities. Let’s just say it only went up hill from there ;). I left my door wide open so people could watch. And other couples I met before came in and joined. I’m so glad I invited people to my room and ended up being a party/play room. I left this weekend with a big smile on my face!
Takeaways Continue to be proactive. Don’t rely on the notion that people will come approach me because I’m single. Most didn’t know I was single until I told them. Take chances and take risks. No risk, no reward. People in LS are the same as regular people they are just more open about sex! They can still be wishy washy, flaky, selfish and hard to gauge. I prefer hotel takeovers and house parties over clubs and dates. I like the no pressure atmosphere and chance to mingle with many folks opposed to just a few.
I think its important to see from a single lady’s perspective that everything isn’t so peachy for us either. We have ups and downs too. We face rejection and have to overcome adversity. LS also forces you to face your own insecurities as well. So you have to face them head on. You also most likely, process things on your own. I don’t have a partner to build me up after rejection or debrief after an LS event. Take for instance Saturday night, I had to process the rejection by myself. I’m in touch with myself enough to know what to do and how to process it. And that’s what I did. I fortunate to bounce back within 20 minutes of alone time.
I think its important for couples to understand the unicorn experience too. It’d help them explain more about us and why we do some of the things we do.
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