The Swingers Help team has been moderating swinger forums for too many years. We are close to developing PTSD from the crazy volume of unsolicited dick pics we’ve had to wade through. After seeing hundreds of swinger ads every day for years, we have noticed plenty of scammy trends. We are sharing them with you so you can save yourself time & frustration.
Remember that scammers are trying their best to blend in with the legit swinger ads. There is a good bit of overlap. Many legit swingers are doing some of the things we are about to mention as scammy signs. Be smart. One or two minor scammy signs are probably a coincidence. When in doubt, be smart and go slow.
Searching Free Sites
Free sites are flooded with scammers. Why? Scammers want to turn a profit. Churning out hundreds of fake profiles on free sites costs no money. Scammers can profit big time no matter how often their profiles are banned. They will use automated bots to brute force past the spam fighters.
The paid swinger sites are tremendously safer because that paywall wipes out the potential scammer’s profits. Besides putting a massive dent into profits, it is harder to churn out different credit card numbers for paid sites. The paid sites also have money to fight spam & a business model to protect, which are more reasons why they are much safer. Scammers know they can make more money doing less work by attacking free sites instead of paid sites. If you are on any free site, be on high alert.
Using Emoticons & Weird Fonts
We know it is cool to use emoticons. They can convey plenty of information in a quick & easy way. Scammers know that those colorful emoticons also draw the users’ eyes. So scammers commonly use multiple emoticons to drive up traffic to their scam listings. Emoticons might not be a full red warning flag, but it is a solid orange-level warning.
Another trick scammers like to circumvent spam filters is to mix in some letters of non-English fonts that appear very similar to English letters. If you see things written like sc@m, or scám, or scãm, or s*c*a*m – remember it is a scam and steer clear.
Missing Critical Info
The free sites often let people post any type of swinger ad. If you see a vague ad missing critical information like location, age, and play preferences – it is unlikely a real swinger. It might be a first-time swinger who doesn’t know better but still avoid it. Those ignorant rookies will likely get nervous and ghost at the last second. Serious swingers know what they want & will include that information.
Scammers don’t want to post specifics because that will narrow down the potential people responding to their traps. They don’t want their victims to be limited to a certain location, age range, or play style, so they tend to keep their swinger ads as vague as possible.
Posting in Multiple Locations
If you come across a hot-swinger ad, check out if that user account has posted any other ads, especially in different locations. Scammers will often post ads all over at the same time. Paid escorts will often go on a traveling circuit, visiting a different city every few days.
If you see someone posting multiple cities, your scam sensors should definitely get turned on to full power. We understand swingers enjoy traveling, so it could be legit, but definitely worth taking a slower & safer approach.
Asking for Money
We shouldn’t have to say this, but anytime a stranger on the internet asks for you to send money to them – IT IS A SCAM. It doesn’t matter if they only ask for gas money or money to get a hotel room. Trust us, you are being scammed.
Yes, we know swingers do commonly split the costs of hotel rooms & other expenses, but that is after you meet in real life. If you haven’t met them, don’t give them money. The only time this will work is if you are trying to hire a paid escort & that isn’t really swinging.
If you are giving money to an escort, make sure to verify them first. Too many escort ads are scams. Verifying the escort will protect you from being scammed or arrested by the police, but we are getting off track.
Pics Too Perfect
We all love sexy pictures. When your expectations are grossly exceeded, that is a red flag. Real swingers look like you and me. We have blemishes, stretch marks, extra pounds, wrinkles, & bad lighting. Imperfection is real & sexy. If the pictures look like a model in a professional studio, they are probably fake. Well, the pictures are probably real & stolen from a modeling site, but the ad is fake.
We know swingers like Mrs. Milford can look amazing, but those freakish sweethearts are making content for their Only Fans. When the pics are too hot, there is a 95% chance it is actually an ad for Only Fans and not for a real swinger date, or worse, a scammer looking to blackmail you.
Pushing For Nudes
If they ask for nudes, go on red alert. Real swingers always see naked people. We don’t need to see hot naked pictures. Sure they are nice but not needed. It is totally fine to send body pics in swimsuits (with your heads cropped out). This will give them an idea of what you look like.
You can send them a separate picture with your faces if they voice verify. Many swingers are comfortable waiting to see your faces till you meet them in real life. Scammers will often send you naked pictures of another couple to guilt you into exposing your private pics. Pushing for naked pics is a big red flag and common among scammers looking to blackmail you.
When In Doubt, How To Proceed?
If you have come across some of these scammy signs, be careful. Walk away if you are worried. If you are hopeful of it being an innocent coincidence, go slowly.
Don’t send any pictures or identifying information till you feel comfortable. Real swingers understand other swingers need to protect their privacy. Use your compartmentalized swinger email account or phone number (Google Voice gives away free numbers), and don’t expose your vanilla contact info. You can also use a secure app like Telegram to safeguard yourself.
Don’t try to troll a troll. Why waste your time? You don’t want to start a war with a scammer. Best case, it will only waste your time. Worst case, if you make any mistake, they will destroy your privacy and cost you as much damage as possible. We have heard horror stories of stolen pictures being forwarded to everyone in their contact list (family, coworkers, neighbors – yikes). Wiser to privately report them to the site administrators and move on.
Stay safe out there!