Are you wondering how to talk to your wife about becoming a hotwife? Like any other change in the dynamic of a relationship, hotwifing can be a big step for couples to take. Even bringing the subject up can be nerve-wracking, especially if you have never done anything like it before.
Before you do anything else, make sure you both trust and love each other enough to have this new element in your relationship. If you are already having relationship problems and think that hotwifing can fix them, keep in mind that there is a good chance that this change will simply complicate matters and make the whole situation worse. Hotwifing and all non-monogamy work best for couples who are very open and communicate well with each other.
Speaking of honest communication, trying to force anyone into a lifestyle that they are not comfortable with is unlikely to end well. So if your wife is not the type to desire to have sex outside of your relationship, do not try and cajole her into it or make her feel guilty. She can end up resenting you for it and the whole situation could cause a lot of relationship stress. If you honestly think your wife would enjoy swinging solo, then hotwifing can be a good idea.
With all that being said, there are a few ways that you can introduce the hotwifing idea. You can start by dropping subtle hints to gauge her reaction. An easy hint is to watch hotwife themed porn together. Mention how much it turns you on and how you would find it hot to see her like that too. Whether or not she responds negatively or positively to this will give you a fair idea if she is open or not to this idea.
Another step you can take is to point it out when you see other men checking her out and tell her that you enjoy knowing that they want her too. If she reacts well to this you can take it a step further and suggest that she wear more provocative and daring clothes so she gets more attention when you are out together. If she still seems to be enjoying this you could see how she feels about flirting with other men while you sit somewhere out of sight and then continue to progress step by step from there until you get to a place where you can bring up a full hotwife situation.
After dropping enough subtle hints and nudges, you can directly ask her what she thinks about possibly experimenting with it in real life. Before you do this, you might want to do some light research to better understand the pros & cons. This can help you better respond to any questions or concerns she might bring up when you discuss it together.
Be prepared to explain your feeling and desires to her. She might be worried that it would put a strain on your relationship. You can reassure her that you won’t get angry or feel jealous about the hotwifing. She may not understand the appeal for you as a man, so explain to her why you get off to her being with other men so she knows that you aren’t liable to switch and be annoyed at her after the deed is already done.
If her issue is more of nerves or fears, you could offer to go together to a club or meet up and simply chat with bulls and other couples with more experience and leave it at that for the night. If she realizes that people are friendly and speaks to some other women who are already hotwives then it can help put here more at ease and open to possibly taking a step towards something physical.
If she isn’t ready for meeting people in real life, a less intimidating step is to explore this online. Together you can browse profiles on non-monogamous dating sites, so she can see what’s out there and even message others without any in-person pressure.
Being Super Patient
Hotwifing can feel very overwhelming since it is very different from what society has traditionally pushed people into following. Make sure to always be patient and let her move at her whatever pace is comfortable for her. She might need weeks or months to become comfortable. Be a supportive partner and let her have as much time as she needs.
When she is comfortable with the idea, make sure to talk about what are the rules and boundaries. Is it OK to include someone you already know as a friend or acquaintance or will they be off-limits? What can she do or not do? Don’t assume anything. The more guidance you can give her, the more comfortable she can feel knowing what is or is not allowed in this non-monogamous experiment.
If she meets someone at a club or online, she can arrange a casual get together first in a public place and you can accompany her to meet the prospective bull. Knowing you are with her or at least nearby can make her feel more comfortable. Show interest in him and make sure the man your wife will be meeting alone seems trustworthy. This will reassure her that he comes across as normal and also shows her that you care enough about her to want to make your own checks on who she will be seeing. Not alone that but it will make the experience less tense for you if you get good vibes from her bull too.
Remember to be patient with her limits if she wants to take things slow and don’t push her to share details that she might want to keep to herself. After her first hook up check in with her and see how the experience was on her end. Reassure her that you still feel the same about her if not think that she is even cooler than before. Show her how excited you are and how turned on her being with someone else. Ask her what she needs if you aren’t sure.
Aftercare is Important
The hotwifing experience may make you both you may want to tear each other’s clothes off the minute she comes home. She might however want to rest a bit, so please remember to keep being patient and supportive. You can always reconnect together the next day. It could also be that she might want to share every naughty detail with you or rather keep it all to herself. Don’t try and pry it out of her if she would prefer it to be private.
If she has a bad first experience, how you act may be the deciding factor in whether or not she will ever do it again. Comfort her and let her speak if that’s what she wants. If you are patient and understanding with her she will feel much safer when it comes to exploring her sexuality.
If you are lucky enough to have a wife that shares your kinks or is at least willing to try what you want, make sure she knows how appreciated she is. Acknowledge her awesome love for you. Be thankful for all the things she does for you. A loving match is a rare find that we should always treasure.