Interested in finding single men for no-strings-attached sex but not sure how to find them? If you have been in a committed relationship for a while, then you probably aren’t up to date on the best ways to meet single men. The casual hook-up scene is very different than what it was even a couple of years ago, and it can be daunting to think about navigating a myriad of apps, dating sites, etc., while anticipating how you’ll introduce your non-monogamous marriage. We’re here to take a little of that pressure off and shine some light on ways to find partners for your hotwifing adventures.
Apps are a very convenient way to find single men, but not all apps are created equal. Some have serious security flaws that put your privacy at riskThe mainstream apps tend to be horrible for privacy and rarely lead to a quality single man that will show up and deliver a good experience. If you want to use a hook-up app, go with one specifically designed for hotwifing or swinging and is also popular for your local area to give yourself a fighting chance. Most apps are only popular in specific regions, which isn’t helpful if you don’t live in that region.
When dealing with apps, it often leads to frustrating low-quality matches. Most people simply swipe left or right depending on how a single picture looks, and they never spend time reading the actual profile to make sure your hotwifing goals match what they are seeking. On the one hand, it is nice that the apps allow for low effort hook-ups, but on the other hand, it can be frustrating to have so many matches, and none of them lead to anything. Apps specifically set up for swingers are better as you can modify the search function a lot more to find a certain type of bull and give you better options when it comes to discretion with things like sharing pictures.
If you like to meet new bulls or bucks while traveling, the apps are a perfect fool as they match by location. So if you fancy having some vacation fun, then make the most of them and see what your new environment has to offer. Be careful and make sure to properly screen the men because apps have plenty of troublemakers. Also, be wary if the app signs you up through your social media. It is best to make a separate account to use if you don’t want it leading back to your personal Facebook or Instagram if you aren’t open about your lifestyle. Like we said earlier, too many of these apps are horrible with privacy. Don’t even get us started on the horrific lack of basic security at 3fun, which basically exposed everyone’s naughty pictures and home addresses. We suggest you stick with the websites.
Dating websites function very much like apps do and have just as many people on there just looking for something casual. Many big dating websites have app versions now, considering that’s what popular at the moment. The good thing with dating sites is that users are much more likely to pay attention to the profile descriptions and to share their details about what they enjoy.
Like apps, there are swingers-only sites, and these lifestyle sites have plenty of verified single men with experience in non-monogamous fun. The swinger sites tend to be one of the best options as you are likely to find more people who are already into and understand the hotwife lifestyle. You can find other hotwife couples to chat with and share recommendations on the bulls & bucks. Just make sure you use the swinger site popular in your local area.
Steer clear of the mainstream dating sites where you are more likely to find most people looking for long-term arrangements and forever relationships. The mainstream users tend not to be very friendly towards non-monogamous profiles, so save yourself the hassle and stick with the swinger sites. The dedicated swinger sites also help keep hotwives safer as they can find single men who have been vouched by other hotwives.
These days even your granny is on social media. Many people are way more open on there than in the past. There are groups set up that cater to everything related to relationships, sex, and everything else. With the backing of a community, people feel much more able to express themselves.
There are also alias accounts people use when they don’t want their identity known. Social media has hashtags and dedicated pages/groups that can make finding a bull a real possibility. The downside is that social media can expose yourself, especially it involves Facebook in any way. The other headache is that social media usually doesn’t focus on local connections, so the odds of a good match tend to be much lower. Finding a sexy match that lives on the other side of the country is probably not the match you want. Maybe you’ll be lucky and beat the odds. On the upside, getting up the courage to approach someone you like the look of is a lot easier when you can just slide in the DMs too than have to ask them in person too.
Lifestyle Parties/Clubs/Meet ups
Any lifestyle-specific events, clubs, and parties are another option to meet bulls. What is great about them is you will know from the start whether or not you genuinely find them attractive and have chemistry. Something that’s hard to judge online even if you do like their pictures and profile. This is a good option for those who are very confident and don’t mind approaching anyone who may catch their eye or being approached. To find your local lifestyle parties and clubs, check out the calendar of events for your local swinger dating site.
Once you are comfortable chatting, it is far easier to get a feel for someone, and you can be direct about what you’re both looking for. Getting follow-up texts and organizing dates with someone you have already met in the flesh is always far more exciting as well because there is always more of a thrill getting messages and building anticipation with someone you have already genuinely clicked with.
If you are more on the shy side, to begin with, online is probably easier for you to be openly flirty, and it makes the approach way less intimidating. There will never be too much of a shortage of men that want to get with hotwives, but especially in smaller clubs and parties, sometimes there can be stiff competition, and you may find yourself competing for someone’s affection.
Mainstream Clubs and Bars
If you and possibly also your husband are the super confident type or you fancy a bit more of a challenge, you can always go bull hunting in mainstream clubs and bars. There will be a whole host of men only too happy to be involved in no strings sex if you put yourself out there.
If the hotwife goes out by herself, it is far more likely that she will be successful, and she doesn’t necessarily even have to mention her lifestyle and to be honest, some men wouldn’t care anyway as it makes no difference to them, especially if they know the husband is consenting.
Getting someone to agree to play with you as a stag & vixen couple may be a little bit more challenging. It involves explaining your lifestyle to someone who may find the whole concept foreign and may not be comfortable with having someone else present. Don’t be surprised if the cocky single man in the bar turns into a dud once clothes start falling off. It is common for men inexperienced with group sex not to be able to overcome the nervous mental hurdles. For a more guaranteed time, stick with the lifestyle parties and lifestyle sites.
Friends and Acquaintances
If you have any friends who know about your lifestyle or seem a bit more on the adventurous side, you could consider propositioning them. This works better if you don’t care who finds out about your hotwifing.
If you are more private, it is a possibility that they could go back and speak about you and/or what you asked them behind your back. You need to know for certain in the situation that the person is trustworthy and nonjudgmental. There is also the chance they will reject your offer, or if they do agree, you need to be sure that a rejection or the introduction of a sexual relationship won’t damage your friendship if that is something that you value.
Honestly, we don’t like this option, but we mention it because it is a common idea that hotwife couples consider. Before you act, think twice about how you will handle it if things go bad with the hotwife experience. It is smarter to make friends out of bulls and not to make bulls out of your friends.
Rest easy knowing there are so many options available now. You can choose to be pickier and find what you are looking for sooner rather than later. Use as many of these options as you like, and your phone will be buzzing with notifications from potential bulls. Enjoy!