Single females in the swinging lifestyle are often referred to as Unicorns because they can be just as challenging & special to find. Many swingers relish the idea of a sexy threesome with a hot lady but don’t like the frustration it can sometimes be to find one. So how can you find your very own unicorn? Your swinging lifestyle guides are here to help! Here are some of the many ways to boost your chances of successfully finding & connecting with a single female swinger.
First, ask yourself why you want a threesome instead of a couple swap. Threesomes tend not to be simpler or easy. It can be hard to balance the desires of three different people. When two couples swap, it tends to be easier since everyone is paired up, and it is less likely that someone will feel left out. If you are thinking about a threesome with a unicorn because one of you has always fantasized about it and the other will take one for the team, then the fantasy may not be worth the potential reality of someone feeling used. And if both of you are excited about experiencing new partners, but maybe he doesn’t like the idea of another man having his wife, then ask yourselves if you are both likely to be satisfied limiting play to only other women. Swinging is a big thing, and you don’t want to rush into something if you aren’t 100% comfortable and ready.
Second, we should explain that not all swinging unicorns are the same, just as not every threesome is the same. Some threesomes (ok, many threesomes) have bisexual action between the ladies. These are referred to as FFM or MFF threesomes. Other threesomes exclude any bisexual play between the ladies, and these are referred to as FMF threesomes because the male is in the middle, and the females won’t be intentionally touching each other. Now let’s talk about how to make this a reality.
Where to look for local unicorns
Local Swinger Website – Search the local swinger dating site that is popular in your area. This is a great way to find experienced unicorns who are ready to play. The downside is that you will be competing with many other swinging couples who are also interested in it. The odds are not in your favor, but it is still possible if you are good at flirting.
Adult Friend Finder – This classic hookup site is still going strong and can connect you with many sex partners. We have had good success finding unicorns using the paid version of AFF.
3Fun – This hookup app was designed for threesomes, so unlike Tinder, you will not surprise the unicorns with the idea of a threesome. The problem is that 3Fun is not as popular as Tinder, what you lose in quantity you gain in quality.
Tinder – Your female half can create a bisexual profile on this hookup app looking to connect with other women. You will have less competition with other people, but it will be harder to convince the ladies on Tinder who weren’t originally planning on a threesome. You can upgrade to premium to help stay discreet.
OkCupid – This dating site allows you to list yourself as in a non-monogamous relationship, so there is no surprise. The downside is that there are many vanilla people on this dating site, and you may not want your family & friends to know you are swingers.
Local Swinger Clubs – Why waste time with online searching if you can jump ahead to real-life connections? Find a local swinger club that allows unicorns and keep an eye on the RSVP list. Bring a good flirting game because unicorns can be in high demand at your local swinger club.
Vanilla Bars – Take your partner out for a fun time at a regular local bar. If you see any attractive single ladies, have the wife approach her and start a conversation. This is unlikely to have a high success rate, but worst case, you have a fun date night together.
How to connect with single ladies
Once you find some unicorns, how do you make a sexy connection and turn your threesome dream into a reality? Here are some helpful tips to improve your unicorn flirting game…
- Be friendly & fun. Single ladies like to have fun as much as everyone else.
- Respect the single ladies & treat them as equals in the adventure. They have feelings and aren’t disposable sex toys.
- Always dress nicely & be well-groomed. You never know where you might encounter a unicorn in the vanilla world.
- Hit the gym & look your swinger best. When you look good, you will feel more confident, and that is extra attractive.
- Showing female interest can help. Bisexual unicorns aren’t very interested when the other woman shows no interest.
- Read their dating profile twice before reaching out to them. Make sure to follow every request in their profile to show you respect their preferences and can be trusted to follow instructions.
- Make the swinging unicorn feel safe. You have your partner to protect you. Share that safe feeling.
- Be flexible. The unicorn may have special requests or rules, be prepared to accommodate them.
- Favor group communication over one-on-one to avoid miscommunication and misunderstandings.
- Go in with no expectations. Be happy with any outcome.
- Ladies taking the lead during 1st contact tends to help improve your odds of connecting with the unicorn.
- Respect their privacy & be discreet. Many single ladies don’t want to be outed.
- Avoid unnecessary restrictions on your side to boost your odds of a connection.
- Ask the lady about her fantasies & help her realize them.
- Life rarely follows a simple script, so be flexible.
Unicorn Hunting Mistakes
- Don’t assume unicorns are unapproachable.
- Don’t be jealous or hint of any drama.
- Don’t rush it or be pushy.
- Don’t dictate. But do openly discuss rules & boundaries.
- Don’t treat this as a unicorn hunt, be friendly & respectful of them as ladies.
- Don’t force quid pro quo. Focus on general fairness and mutual satisfaction.
- Don’t play with cheating women unless you enjoy drama.
- Don’t mislead them or fake an emotional connection.
Unicorn Threesomes Do Happen
Yes, threesomes with a single lady do have a reputation of being as rare as unicorns, but they do happen. It is just not as easy or as simple as a couple swap where two people connect with two other people. If you follow our advice and put in some time & effort, you can make this happen. Of course, don’t be surprised if along the way you decide it’s not a unicorn threesome is as important as you originally thought and get distracted with other sexy alternatives 🙂