Like any big change to your life, swinging can be a big risk to your relationship. But if you venture into this type of non-monogamy at the right time, you might find it strengthens the bond between you and your partner. Swinging can help your relationship by enhancing your sex life and helping you get closer to each other, but it isn’t a magic cure-all.
Non-monogamy can fix a few gaps, but it isn’t going to rebuild broken foundations. If your relationship isn’t already on good grounds where you can trust each other, enjoy each other’s company, and love each other, then swinging will only finish it faster.
Here are some of the most common ways that swinging can help couples:
Communication
Because communicating is so crucial for non-monogamy to work without heartbreak, many swingers open up to their partners more than before because it has become a habit. You might start to talk more about how you feel and be more direct in asking for the things you need to feel happy. Frankly, dangling the potential reward of scorching sex can be the best motivator for some couples to take their communication skills to the top level.
Trust
Swinging isn’t something you can do without trust. You trust your partner to tell you about their sexual intimacy with other people, you trust them to say to you their emotions about your escapades, and you trust that they won’t leave you for someone new. Non-monogamy can develop trust between you as you and your partner are allowed to show that you don’t lie and will always respect your boundaries. Seeing your partner having great sex & happily coming home with you builds a track record to reassure your trust in each other.
Enhanced Sex Life
There is no doubt that swinging can increase the amount of sex you have and the frequency with which you have it – what’s not to love? You can live out your wildest sex fantasies and watch your partner happy as they explore their own. It’s surprising how much you can learn in the swinging lifestyle, from new techniques to communication in bed. These can all enhance your sex life, generally, and back home when it’s just the two of you again. Yes, the sex at a swinger club can be eye-opening, but the sex you have afterward at home while you reconnect is heart-opening.
Bond
You might know you love the same movies or dance to the same music, but do you know if he’s into that thing you’re into (you know, that thing)? You might discover something really fun. For example, you might like the same woman or have a shared fantasy. Your bond could even be strengthened just because you have a saucy secret between you both. You can share the excitement of your next big night out and revel in each other’s stories from the last one.
Excitement
They say that variety is the spice of life… and they aren’t wrong. Sometimes the only thing lacking from a relationship is some excitement. You could go on a six-month holiday and backpack around Peru, or you could try something closer to home. Swinging can inject excitement into a relationship and provide a fun new journey that distracts you from your everyday life of bills, work, and child-rearing. It offers the opportunity to revisit those exciting feelings of new relationship energy as you uncover the swinging lifestyle together.
Rekindle Your Spark
When was the last time you and your partner went for dinner? Or they bought you flowers? Or you cooked them dinner? The first few months of a relationship are filled with romance and sexiness, but as time passes, many couples start to take each other for granted. Swingers embarking on the journey of non-monogamy together can rekindle this sexy spark, as after years of seeing their partner as a ‘parent,’ they see them in a new light again. We all fall into routines, but swinging pulls you out of that.
Confidence
There’s little more confidence-boosting than turning heads when you walk into a bar – except maybe if you’re not wearing any clothes. While on some occasions, you will be fighting off your swinger insecurities with one hand and accepting a drink from a sexy stranger with the other, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone might leave you surprised by how normal it all feels. Besides, everyone has flaws and imperfections. Receiving compliments from the friendly swinger community can also help you believe the compliments your partner has given you all this time.
Health
As an unexpected benefit to your relationship, many couples find that their health improves when partner-swapping. It’s easy to let yourself go when you’re in a long-term relationship as you perhaps don’t feel like you need to make an effort, but if you’re regularly hooking up with other people, you can find yourself wanting to look and feel your best. This means swingers tend to keep themselves in better shape. Again, the potential reward of amazingly hot sex is a great motivator to restart working on the helpful things that may have fallen by the wayside.
Independence
Co-dependence in long-term monogamous relationships is common. Couples can find themselves with the same group of friends, shared finances, eating the same meals, and having the same hobbies. This isn’t always healthy, and spending so much time with your significant other can result in growing feelings of resentment as you fear losing your identity outside of being a couple. Swinging can allow couples to find themselves again as they explore their own sexual desires separate from their partners.
Companionship
Couples may also benefit from the number of new friends they make on the swinging scene. These adventurous companions can be an exciting change from your usual group of vanilla friends, and you will both benefit from having people you can talk to about your sex life. You’ve already trusted them with intimate knowledge about you, so opening up about other parts of your life can be surprisingly easy.
Adding It Up
We aren’t saying that swinging is perfect. There are many potential swinger pitfalls. Non-monogamy is not the best idea for everyone. Even if it is appealing, a couple can rush and make the wrong decisions for their relationship. Everyone should be careful as they explore these potential benefits of the swinging lifestyle.